Another's point of view

I am always praying for patience with people. To show them more compassion. To be kind and listen to people.

I fail at it daily.

I feel I fail so miserably that I can never be what/how I want to be.

Then God sends words my way to encourage me that even though I still have some things to work on, I have grown.

My dearest friend says to me yesterday "You are so good at keeping quiet and praying through your emotions when someone confronts you or upsets you or has news you don't want to hear. How do you stay calm and collected? Have you always been this way?".

I chuckled. I don't see myself that way AT ALL.

I see an impatient, judgmental, harsh person. I don't feel calm. I started thinking back. No, I haven't always been like this. I used to be snippy, back-talk and sarcastic. I would wear my thoughts all over my face and if I didn't like you or what was being said it would show. I would say that I've been better at holding my tongue and thinking through my words more in the last 6 years. That is how long I've really given my life back to Christ and pursued a serious relationship with Him.

How do I do it? I have no idea and at the same time I know exactly how!
    It certainly isn't me. My flesh is impatient. My flesh is mean. My flesh only wants to deal with people I like. BUT, the God in me is beyond patient. The God in me is compassionate. The God in me loves EVERYONE.

I still have to fight the flesh and let the God in me show, but as I grow with Christ and seek Him and His ways it becomes easier and easier.

I've prayed a lot lately to be better and God used my sweet friend to remind I am getting better because He is making me better. She looked to me for advice and she in turn, without even knowing it, encouraged me :)

Heart for Souls

I am in the middle of "Kisses From Katie", a book about a young woman who ventured out on a year long mission's trip after high school that has turned into her life's work. I just visited Katie's blog and read some of the most recent postings.

I'm wrecked.

This woman's heart is amazing. She's following the call God has placed in her and she's daily living out the love of Christ to those most deem unworthy.

I'm seeking God. Desiring a heart like that. Asking God to work in my spirit a love that sees past dirty clothes, unbathed bodies, people who "aren't like me".

I think about my dear friends the Shafer's who, at this moment I'm writing, are with another couple, the Flanary's doing missionary work in Peru. Their heart for souls is one I envy. I can't get passed my own pride to see more then what my natural eyes view.

My heart is changing, though. A little at a time. My prayers for the Shafer's and Flanary's and now my prayers for Katie and her work feel more urgent. Asking God how I can help.

Will I ever go to another country to do ministry work? I don't know.

Right now, my mission field is right here... my apartment building, my workplace, my local Wal-Mart, my city park, my neighborhood, the community my church is in... that is where I need to work NOW.

God, change my heart to be more like Your heart. Help me to see souls. Help me to view people with the love and compassion You daily show to me. I seek to further Your Kingdom. 

Beauty In The Mess

Here in WV we just had another round of snow come through. It was a doozey! My Mr. and I went to Walmart the evening after it came through. A wet heavy snow laid on everything. Limbs were weighed down, roads were covered, power was out in places. It looked grim and messy. The next morning my Mr. took me to work. It was a sunny-blue sky day. The contrast of the bright white snow against the gleaming blue sky was gorgeous! See....

The first photo is one I took on my way to work. The second and third are ones that a friend posted (next town over).

It got me thinking. Everyone always complains about how ugly, messy, inconvenient the winter storms are, but we usually don't take time to appreciate and notice the beauty.

What a shame it would be if God did the same thing with us! Instead of stopping to bask in how beautiful we are, He just complains about how much of a mess we make of things. I'm thankful that God sees the beauty in me and not mess.